It’s been hard to write these past few days. People have been trying to shut my voice down because they feel threatened by what I have to say. You see, I’m someone who speaks out about injustice. I always have. It started off because I had to defend myself. I was born in Australia to migrant muslim parents and have never fit in anywhere. I’m not black enough and I’m not white enough and I’m not Iranian enough. I nearly always get asked where I’m really from when I have just told someone that I am Australian, because to them, I don’t look Australian enough.
That’s a tough thing to live with all of your life, not fitting in and having to defend yourself because of the colour of your skin. But, I never used it to be a victim. I actually ended up using it to become a defence lawyer. To defend others. I always use my voice to defend others. So, what’s gotten me to waiver these last few days? It’s getting told by, mostly white people, that it’s not my time to speak up about what I have witnessed or experienced, or, that I am trying to use the cause for my own hurt. Fuck, I would be lying if I said that the killing of George Floyd and others hasn’t affected me. I am grieving as if he was my own brother. I am grieving because black people are being attacked, hurt or killed simply because of the colour of their skin. And, yes, of course that brings up my own pain and hurt. I am hurt for what I have endured and for what my kids and parents and sister have endured. I’m fucking human. But I certainly am not using this for any kind of personal benefit! That’s sick and twisted! Sometimes I wish I had the choice to not have to be on the defensive all of the time.
The black lives movement has created momentum for others to speak out, others in countries apart from America too. Others who have had first hand experience of racism and who want to help create change, real change. This hasn’t been something that has popped up overnight for a lot of people, including me. So, if you want to really do something about creating change, don’t just do the right thing now because it’s expected of you, or because it’s popular. Call out any injustice you see from now on in. Do something in your life to create real change where you see injustice. Listen and don’t argue. Learn, but then don’t go and preach or judge or try and school others with aggression, just share what you have learned, but definitely not with aggression.
So, if you’re new to this world of learning about anti racism, good on you! The more the merrier! But please remember this, don’t school others about it until you properly listen to what they are saying. Everyone has a right to be heard, everyone!! And, before you judge someone remember that they may not look black enough to have a say, but people with real life experiences, whether personally or through a family member can share a lot and help others navigate towards a world where every life matters. For the moment, we are focusing on black lives, indigenous people and people of colour.
Also know this, being a true voice against racism or any injustice is not popular. You will lose “friends” you will be accused of all kinds of bullshit, but use that to make yours louder for good, for justice!
Ok, now that I have gotten some of that off my chest, I suppose I need to let you know how I’ve been going with other stuff. My book is with my editor friend, so, I have nothing to report, despite waiting with bated breath for an email from her…will she even bother or will she run a million miles away because it’s the biggest load of shit she’s ever read!? And, the scales went down again, I haven’t been in the mood to eat over the last couple of days, the scales are loving it! That’s me for today. I’ll be back tomorrow. Stay safe.
365 Days to Achieving My Success