The emotions and energies are very intense at the moment, and you know what? It’s all ok! Everything is going to be ok. This is all just part and parcel of shedding and growth. There is always pain attached when there is growth. Unfortunately we can’t avoid it, trust me, I’ve tried! And in all honesty, the pain of trying to hang on to what wasn’t meant for me was worse in the long run. I’ve had a lot of lessons around surrender and, can sit here and say that I still suck at it. I try and surrender and trust. I do trust the Universe implicitly at a soul level, but my human brain gets in the way sometimes and wants to be a control freak and make sure that everything is being done according to how I think it should be done! 🤦🏻♀️
The other thing is this, it’s ok for us to feel. We can’t deny it. We all feel, that’s why we are witnessing what is going on in the world today. People are letting out how they feel. “As above, so below, as within, so without, as the universe, so the soul”. Some of us have had enough and want to express our feelings, others don’t know what to do with their feelings and others continue to suppress them. Society has programmed us to not show our true feelings, or accept how others feel. That’s why a lot of people can’t be honest in the moment and say, hey, that hurt me. Or, what you just said or did made me feel whatever. Most people get offended or defensive when someone is honest about how they made them feel.
We’re made to feel guilty for how we feel, or, we second guess how we’re feeling and then think that we’re over reacting or carrying on. Sometimes we can even be guilty of over reacting and carrying on, and, that’s ok too. As long as it’s not an everyday occurrence, because that would be some painful shit to live with.
I used to be scared of my feelings. I tried to control them, to soldier on, to deny and suppress them. I feel so deeply. It hurts to be me a lot of the times. At times I have made myself sick and have literally hidden in my bed as an adult to keep myself protected. I had to do what I had to do to get through. And, that’s ok. I have learned that my feelings aren’t anything to be scared of. Again, easier said than done when I’m in the midst of feeling them, but when I can remind myself of what they actually mean, it makes life less painful. I found that my feelings were a sign from my body/higher self, telling me to take notice that something in my life was out of alignment. Somewhere, I wasn’t being truthful to who I am, or, I was overthinking and creating something that wasn’t going to happen.
I literally ask my feelings what they are trying to tell me and where I need to look, within myself. For example, when I was going through severe financial hardship about 5 years ago, I would feel mega anxiety and fear and stress. I was feeling unsafe and insecure because I thought that I would be destitute. But, when I analysed it, broke it down, and then asked myself, what’s the worst thing that could happen? I found that it was just the idea and thoughts that were turning it into a bigger issue than it actually was. Yes, being broke isn’t nice, and you do feel insecure and unsafe, but when you break it right down and ask, what’s the worst thing that could happen, well, for me, the worst thing would have been if I didn’t have an opportunity to rebuild. And, I found that in the rebuilding of my financial life, and relationship with money, and ultimately the rest of my life, I was able to build a more solid foundation for myself. And it was built on what I valued most, which is freedom, truth and simplicity.
Everything I do now, I run by those three values instead of running it by money. Does it make me feel free? Is it truly what I want at a soul level? Does it keep my life simple? That’s how I reconciled my relationship with money. It’s how I live my day to day life, it’s how I decide to work and who I work with and, who I spend my time with and what I spend my time on. I don’t always remember to do this because it’s a life long learned habit to fear feelings or to jump into doing something without taking the time to check in with those values. And, nearly every time I don’t run it by them, I end up getting to a point and thinking, bloody hell, I didn’t follow my soul’s guidelines! 🤦🏻♀️
Emotions and energies are beautiful. And yes, even when they’re intense and it feels like you’re going to implode. You’re growing, the world is growing, we are evolving and, the Universe is ushering in what is meant for your highest good and ultimately, the highest good of the collective!
We have movement on the scales people! That 500 grams that went on when I went on a binge, has all gone and more. I think the warmer weather helps too because I don’t feel like eating as much as I do when it’s cold. I prefer colder weather, I love the foods and clothes during the winter months. It’s just so much more wholesome! I had fish and veggies for dinner last night and am having it again tonight. My hubby is going to be cooking himself spaghetti bolognese tomorrow night…this is a true test of my choice to be a pescatarian. He makes the nicest spaghetti bolognese around. I’ve got to think of what I’m going to cook for myself. A master piece, something drool worthy! I better start researching and preparing! I’ll keep you filled in.
I’ve actually been revamping and editing a lot of ebooks that I had created over the years. I need to write every day. If I don’t write something, I feel lost. Even if I don’t publish what I write, I have to write. It’s like breathing for me.
Anyway, I hope you have a fab day/night where ever you are in the world and, I’ll be back tomorrow. 💜
365 Days to Achieving My Success